Thursday, January 26, 2012

Who Am I?

Disclaimer: I LOVE my husband very much and am thankful to be sharing this life with him. Marriage is rad... adjusting to being seen as 'married' is a bit harder.

I knew going into this thing that changing my name was going to be a bit tough for me. I have been ME for a long time now. I'm really good at being me. I'm used to hearing Melissa Gail Gaare. I've been used to writing it and signing it. I have always answered to it.

Now that I'm (happily!) Mrs. Jaramillo, I always get my name called out multiple times at doctor's appointments. I haven't gotten used to answering to the correct pronunciation of my new last name, much less the hundred ways that it can be mutilated.

...Um, Mrs. Jam-a-rillo...
...We're ready for Melissa Jar-of-Melons...
...Calling Jar-y-mayo, for the last time...

"Oh oops! Sorry that's me, the one who has been sitting within three feet of you the entire time you were calling this mystery person."

I love my new name and I like to practice signing it. Chris laughs at me because my signature includes each and every single letter.

Him: "Wow. You can actually READ your signature."
Me: "Duh! I'm a fan of good penmanship."
Him: "Yeah with this long name... you will probably get over that."

I have to admit that sometimes I look at the two squiggly lines that he calls his signature and get a little bit jealous... it's quick and easy. BUT I like my penmanship too much to give it up quite yet. I don't mind spending the extra time to sign my full name, the people behind me at check out might, but they'll survive.

Today I went through some hoops and redtape because of a typo in my medical insurance record. I have the insurance (that I am very thankful for!) through Chris' job and this is new to me. I have always been THE individual in question for insurance, bank accounts, paperwork, etc. Every phone call and in person interaction today I was asked, "So your husband is the primary card holder?" But to me it sounded a lot like, "So you're not the one who really counts here?"

I knew before getting married that there would be adjustments in getting used to sharing money, sharing space, sharing life... I was prepared to have to compromise and adjust to this new partnership. I knew that I was no longer an individual living this life with only myself to answer to... BUT I was not prepared for other people to see me as half of a whole. I was (and still am) really excited to be Mrs. Chris Jaramillo, but in the I'm still totally Melissa Gail Gaare kind of way.

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